Below are the 13 most recent journal entries recorded in thebiggesterror's LiveJournal:

Wednesday, September 22nd, 2004
5:55 pm	day after bday wow.. i haven't written in a while, and what a better day to write than the day after my birthday!!!! such a great day and all lets face it..give alot of props to marcella because if it wasn't for her half the school wouldn't even know..which was what i wanted at first, but it was nice to hear happy birthday from everyone. The other part of the props goes to Ethan. He made it a great birthday just by keeping my company after school =) hehe. got alot of stuff..i don't want to list..but..it was nice for those of you who got me a gift =). thankies, Ethan, Marcella, Sarah and kyle..Amberoni said she got somthing..so me thank her too..id thank my parents but they don't read this..so YEAHHHHH *****mary***** (Comment on this)
Wednesday, August 25th, 2004
10:25 pm	heres somthing to think about Whats does your personality rate from 1-10? by morning_prayer Your first full name Your personality rates a 8 your best quality is youre loyal your worst quality is everything about you this is because Of the people you hang around Quiz created with MemeGen! Current Mood: determined (1 Comment |Comment on this)
Monday, August 23rd, 2004
4:21 pm	bored Not in a good mood...bye Current Mood: numb (Comment on this)
Sunday, August 22nd, 2004
11:14 pm	damn... Okay..im so sorry i haven't updated in a while..technically i did..it just keeps erasing it! im like FUCKKK FUCKK FUCKK! okay..just to say why im not in the bestest mood thursday was the end of my cheerleading tryouts and..guess what?!..didn't make it. its fine now, because i thought on it the past couple of days and no one made it on my previous squad exept for brittney powers and major congrats to her. the coaches were bitches anyway..my mom was like..."just think about all those times you won' thave to shave often"...those are her comforting words!but she did take me shopping at fair oaks..and isn't that the cure for me besides food?.....girls, you know what im talking about!..if you think its true..comment por favor. Then saturday i had my first "band practice" which didn't go the way i wanted because amber forgot to bring victor and there was no drummer because that got confusing because ethan was suppose to drum for us. but than he had a problem bringing his equiptment over..so than he had to convince his mom to let him and i think he said he was drumming for us again. me,mandy and amber desided to do the whole cover song thing first. I wonder if anyone ever reads this...i don't feel that people do..but okay? Got introduced to the best band ..Jack Off Jill..and seroiuslly..THEY'RE FUCKING AWSOME. okay. yeah. poor sarah has someone whos dieing of cancer, so please pray for him everyone..even if you don't know him because you know what, for those of you who know what its like to have someone in your family/friends die of cancer its not pretty, its like watching someone slowly die...they get fragile and so frail...you don't even want to hug them, i know because my grandma died of cancer =( R.I.P grandma i love you. okay..Just kinda sad today..maybe its because ..nevermind im not going there..i need to hang out with someone..call...# is 703-971-3987....Also, topic on relgion, it seems like there less believers than non-believers. it seems like everyone just says "im evil" because they're too lazy to change there ways and i think people deep down have a chance to just change themselves..i know alot of miracles have happend in my life, and its because of God ..im just sick of people trying to bring down christians..theres nothing wrong with it..nothing..if anything.you SHOULD be thinking wheither you want to spend an eternity in hell..or heavan..your choice.. **mary** Current Mood: aggravated (Comment on this)
Saturday, August 14th, 2004
8:46 pm	god im one lazy ass! HOLA AMIGOS/AMIGAS okay...well the reason my subject is the way it is..I WOKE UP AT 5PM TODAY! YES 5! i beat my record of like 4..anyway.. so..i haven't done much today and im getting really annoyed because my Y button is like stuck so ireally have to press down on it..its getting better as i keep typing..WHATS WRONG WITH MY KEYBOARD! THE C DOESN'T WORK..THE Y DOESN'T WORK..wtf?! okay. im weird sorry. i guess ill put a poem in because i have nothing much to say..!? you've pulled me down with the strongest gravity you've nailed all my flaws to a great pitty. you oyell at me as though it were an activity you've taken over my mind with such destructivity leave me alone and just let me be.. so take your feet and make a dance pivot this is my life..its not y our and let me live it you've got that lighter of your tall fire is lit.. you catch me on fire all b ecause your throwing one of your famous fits. maybe if you would calm your nerves my face would be so mething you could accually observe sometimes i wish you could be more observant to see that im not a peasant nor a servant the suns so florescent but all i see it as is another depressant its so far away... okay..later chicos and chikas.. :-) byebyebyebyebyebye *Mari* Current Mood: lazy (Comment on this)
Friday, August 13th, 2004
11:55 pm	back from my spectacular date! wow..okay..forget about yesterday dude.. IM HEAD OVER HEALS IN LOVE ANYWAY OH MAN.................. MARRRRRRYYYYYY ME.......MARRRRRYYYYY MEEEEEEE.................. IM LOVING TO SING TODAY MAN!. okay ill stop with the creepy shit. I love Ethan..did i mension that?.....=) M A R Y L O V E S E T H A N THANK YOU GOD FOR THIS THING CALLED LOVE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! IM CRAZZZYYYYYYYYYYYYYY!!!!!!!!!!!!! AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH! IM THE BEST MOOD OF MY LIFE!!!!!!!!!!!!! UNTIL 3 YEARS FROM NOW~ andway...i can't get over this feeling im having right now..yes its better than when you're drunk surprisingly ..j/p..i wouldnt know..i don't drink.....okay..just a little..but not lately..IM CLEAN OF EVERYTHING :) IM COOL. okay..well..i should have expressed this feeling in the xanga if it would accually let me in...ill try it now...hahaha *MARI* Current Mood: loved (Comment on this)
Thursday, August 12th, 2004
7:53 pm	fucking upset as anything.. You know..im fucking sick of everything. especially today. yesterday was just as bad. i had a fight with somebody, and ontop of that that person started just randomly getting depressed on me. crying and all i walked over to the medicine cabinet..took whatever pills i could find and i could have cared less what happend to me..it was probably like my dads heart medicine or something..i don't know. but that didn't exactly help making me drowsy like i had hoped. I woke up this morning ..accually afternoon (2:00) feeling extremely dizzy and i fell over. when i woke up. i've stayed in my room this whole day and tried to avoid anything that involved talking until now..when i realized im fucking bored of moping around the godamn house. my moms trying to find out whats wrong..and you know for once nothings her fault. It just hurts so bad to know a person that you care for so godamn much is feeling so much pain and so randomly..but i guess that person must not love me as much as they say too..im in a shitty mood and im sorry that you have to read this..but i have to let it out..but maybe it wasn't such a good idea to let the public read this people might think i just want "attention"...doesn't everyone....this time..its seirously how i feel. thanks for listening assholes .. *mary* Current Mood: crushed (Comment on this)
Wednesday, August 11th, 2004
8:39 pm	just a poem and random shit im a plague- im so lost within myself trying to realize that im not the person i was taking my will to smash it in two right split between the middle its like one moment i lie and studder the next i play it off like nothing ever occured im a horrible liar, a horrible liar with a bad excuse bad exuse of i never hear a word you speak im a headache with sinus pressure im a disease that carrys the worst plague you'll meet im the thing that looses your voice because im overpowering yours im the time that ticks everytime your late no point in huvvering over my problems lets accomplish making yours worse thats what im good at doing anyway... okay..so today was alright i guess. just woke up met up with Ethan the last day of summer school but only stayed for a short bit until my mom just comes honking up to us and was like.."come with me you're getting a haircut" im like..SHIT. so i leave ethan go to the hair cuttery while the lady gets scissor happy and id like to announce tha ti now look like a french poodle. my hair is extremely curly and short. THANKS ALOT CHINCO LADY! anyways. my moms been telling me how weird it looks and such..my dad likes it..i don't its too poofy,.ill just either straighted it or put it halfway so the poof isn't there so much. you know this is a littler random and im kinda late for all of this..but im kinda glad i didn't go to warped tour..i woul dhave wasted my first concert on something so godamn stupid..everyone goes..and the only bands id really want to see would have been the casualties, anti flag, bouncing souls..and NOFX if they were there..but i dont reall remember if amber said they went whatever. i wish No Doubt would tour again over here because i missed the concert with them and Blink at nissan..for those of you who don't know im a diehard fan..i haven't expressed it like i did in like 8th grade..i was horrible i try to not show it was much. See..also..i think their new stuff is horrible..i love their old stuff..they use to be a ska band..but they kinda changed after Eric Stefani left the band. whatever ima go now.because i have better things to do than write in here (not really) FUCK OFF! *MARI* Current Mood: blah (Comment on this)
Monday, August 9th, 2004
9:05 pm	abosolutly nothing Heyaz.. Long time sence i've written..quite frankly i could give a damn because i don't think anyone reads this. And if people do..they start reading the first couple lines because no ones IMing them..and than once someone talks to them..there goes the X. anyways..i just came back from being with a 3 day vacation with amber. and lets just say it was pretty funny.especially when my bottom of my bathing suite ripped trying to jump a fence to get to the hot tub which was at the time closed for hotel reasons...*watever that is..* and well..i got stuck coming down..and it looked like i had a major wedgie..and once i got it unhooked it kinda ripped so you could see my ass..which was just canded..im sure...*juuuusttt kiddding* i was likie..'amber hurry up and get your ass out the hot tub..my ass is cold over here!'.....HAH. see..i can make a cheesy joke once in a while. Lately haven't been in this like great mood..maybe its just cuz its summer and not quite feeling the love anymore?..whateva! im gonna go... **MARI** Current Mood: depressed (Comment on this)
Wednesday, July 14th, 2004
11:38 am	long time no write.... Hey people..incase you guys had no idea...im back from zee cruise. Im not going to explain more than Bermuda is beautiful. It was great to just see Ethan again..hes like the first person i called when i got bak, and he was like shocked...at first i was like.."hES nOt eXiTeD tO tAlK To Me"...*Secretly cries* okay..anywaYS..than i was so psyched to hang out with Amberoni and cheese. We just hung out... But it feels weird to talk about all thsi because it happend a week ago..(or did it?) ...omg...its not a week ago..DAMN SUMMER GOES BY SLOW! Lately i've just spent the night at marcellas house which was strange beause we use to be really good friends...like onnected to the hip friends..and i guess something happend along the way so like this whole year we didn't really hang out..like we stopped to talk and stuff..but thats it. But i guess we recently reaalized that we were meant to be good friends. yeah..so that was fun. Right now im sort of waiting till 1:30..to go visit Ethan at Edison...hes going to summer school..=( i feel so awful that he has to go, because it gets him down..and we cant talk late at night anymore. Im not even sure what happend with us last night...i told him i'd text him something..but he never texted back..maybe he didn't get it? or maybe i was just being a bitch last night. But of course im the first person to blame myself,i like to do it..because SOMEONES GOTTA ADMIT SOMETHING. i don't know why.but the smallest things just get me down...its like..lastnight Ethan wasn't really in a talking mood so i sorta just..didn't talk either or something..and it didn't turn out a good night at all in that subject..because at the same breath its like..im at marcella's house..and i unno...its like i have this frown. Why does stuff like that happen while im at my friends house? idk..oKey..i think im going to go because theres not much moore to say because if i say anymore im going to just depress myself...but accually now that i think... I was just watching this interview wtih My Chemical Romance..and if you didn't know what their name was all about..i believe what htye just said was that the world is over medicated with chemicals..like in the meds..and people just kinda depend on those to help themeselves out...which i found to be completely true...everyone gets depressed..just some people make more of a deal out of it then others..is all..but everyone can get themselves out of it without meds..but tahts just what i think..don't come running after me with a knife saying you need them..im not trying to offend anyone..okay..Peace love and flower power..(lol chrissy) **)9)*()W@#*74(&MARY*09808ERE)&8379687E647)*^36428376*&^*#&^$^* wooooo UFO (meaning...YOU!....FUCK OFF! lol...MADE THAT UP MYSELF =)) Current Mood: confused (Comment on this)
Friday, July 2nd, 2004
9:10 pm	leaving for Bermuda =/ Heyaz my lovely friends and enemys. wow..tomorows the day i go to the cruise to Bermuda..and im not sure how exited i am..or for that matter how i feel about going. of course when im accually on the cruise i'll like jump for joy..but..now its like...BUS RIDE =( i have to take a 2 hour drive up to philly. which won't be fun considering ill have my mom next to me..and either she won't talk at all...or she won't shut up..but i guess it depends..i have a feeling it'll be the second thing i said. Im really looking foward to coming back just to really get some stuff accomplished. for 1..me, amber, ethan and this guy victor whom i haven't met yet, are forming a band..and im extremely exited about it. i convinced my mom to let us use the garage. thank god. but..eh. i have to get fit and ready for cheerleading also. To tell you the truth i don't really want to try out..its fun..but theres definatly more compitition..which i've never been the best at..with my luck ill cheer and fall flat on my ass. Also i really hate this reputation we get....WE'RE NOT SNOBS! we're normal people..hyper if anything..and we just need to get some energy out..and beleive me im not doing it for the popularity..theres no such thing anyway. I also promised sam the man i'd join up for tennis with him..and so we plan to play a couple games when i get back so that should be fun. Getting a new skateboard as well so i can bust my ass even more..but i have alot of stuff to do as well. If i come back from the cruise looking like a blimp..it'll be because the people on the cruise feed the hell out of you till your able to roll around. :-/ worried about that as well....lol... DIET!!!!! DIET!!!!! DIET!!!! OKAY...also..im going to miss ethan most importantly..sorry..i will...even if it was a day...id still miss him..because i love him...ALOT. (notice how im in a better mood than much earlier today to get technical) *******mary******* Current Mood: busy (Comment on this)
Thursday, July 1st, 2004
11:25 pm	not as great as i was a while ago.... wow..im not sure if you guys have ever had one of those shitty emotions of careing for someone so much it stabs in the heart to know they're not doing so well in a happy sort of way?....this is just how i feel alot. i guess its cause im too emotional..but...hell..i don't want to call myself a fucking emo kid..because i make fun of those..its like GO TAKE YOUR GODAMN PROBLEMS AND SHOVE EM UP YOUR ASS.don't get me wrong..its fine to have problems..but dont publicize it so much that your like..oh..im an emo kid. sorry. im not in such a good mood at the moment. which is fucking hillarious because i was so hyper and nice like 8 hours ago. sad eh"? heres a poem a wrote a long time ago to match up with this feeling. why won't my lonley heart heal? i bandaged it, and wrapped it, hoping it wouldn't bleed to death but it did... and i hold it in my hands and im trying to keep it from leaking on my carpet. i look up to the sky for help but who ccan help a weak person when we are living in a hell full of careless demons with my heart in my hands. my eyes roll out of its sockets. i put my head back quick to stop them from attempting to fall but how can i stop my eyes from falling if everything is falling apart? including my love for what i use to adore but now the love is gone.. it has shattered into a million pieces as it reflects in a broken mirror as it sits there reflecting a picture of me stressing the cry than it shows up on my wonderful past.. but i know that i can never have it back the mistake i've made sucks me into a black horror filled room. it locked me in, it has not one window.... so now.... i suffocate. yes..its bad i know...but hell i don't give what you think....to tell you the truth..its how i feel sometimes wheni think about how dumb i really was this whole year. The stuff i did to make myself look like a badass and it all thwipped back in my face..for those of you who know me extremely well. im gonna go. ill try to writ etomorow..im going on cruise..leaving saturday morning at 8:45..so. its whatever..HEEZY PEEZY ITS ONLY 11:35..... *(*(*(*(*()*)*)*)*)*)a(asoifdnameasdfjljlostlaksjdf)*)*)*)*)* Current Mood: worried (Comment on this)
9:21 pm	FUN =) Ok...HI you know what? i had another live journal..but..i lost the password. whatever. i like this one better. Yesterday and half of today was kickass..went to ambers house at like 9:30 and as soon as i entered the door we're all like.."lets skate!"..so we're out till like 12 going to like shoppers to get cookies..we get home and bake em. and they're good as hell..considering im a sap for chocolate sometimes.,..SOMTIMES. damn..than we watched the wedding singer and played aggresive inline and amber so kicked my ass in that game =( I WAS JUST STARTING OFF!!! Than we ended up going to bed maybe 3:30-4 and we woke up around 10:30...AWFUL TIME WAKING UP but than we went to the pool..chilled out..amber got hit on by a group of black guys who were like wee man's size...sadly..they looked like they were 1o. DAMN WHATS WRONG WITH KIDS THESE DAYS?!gah!. Rest of today totally sucks though..im just sitting here listening to the Rancid Cd amber let me borrow..although i still have her Emery cd..which i really should give back..IM SO GONNA BURN THAT FROM HER. fucking awsome band. WHY AM I CUSSING SO MUCH TODAY!?....FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK A DUCK...(At first i typed Dick and i swear..i didn't even mean to..but that owuld make more sence than duck..but margie made it up..) um. okay im gonna go now. I THINK IM PARANOID AND COMMPLICATED! XxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxMARYXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxX Current Mood: bouncy (Comment on this)